Becky's Story

Whilst the reason for us getting in touch with the Hospice was for my mum’s end-of-life care, the range of services on offer went way beyond that – probably like a lot of people, we had no idea how far they stretched. I met so many different people accessing a lot of different types of support, for a variety of reasons.

It really stunned me just how much we were offered.

Seeing my mum deteriorate was difficult to watch. She’d undergone lots of treatment for her breast cancer, but unfortunately it had spread further, and before long she began to feel dizzy. After a few tests we discovered it had spread to her brain. At that point we knew it would be a terminal diagnosis. It was then that Hospice in the Weald got in touch and began to explain how they could help my mum and the whole family.

Towards the end, mum couldn’t open her eyes, but we knew she could hear. So, we played her favourite music and comforted her with familiar sounds. We began to also read to her. It felt like a full circle, from her reading to us as children to us now reading to her. Being a teacher, I had to record my lessons and often had to read to the class. So, I asked if she didn’t mind me recording a reading for my class and from there that became something we’d do together. My brother, sister or I would read to her which she really liked. It was strangely comforting for us too.

The sicker she got, the less she could communicate with us. It got to the point where she couldn’t tell us what she wanted, apart from ‘Goo’. The word ‘Goo’ will forever be stuck in my mind. ‘Goo’ meant anything soft that she could eat. Custard, macaroni cheese or rice pudding, that all became affectionately known as ‘Goo.’ Even the nurses knew what Goo was. I’ll always remember ‘Goo’ when I have custard or soft food and think of mum. Although it was a tough time it did still make us all laugh.

The doctors and nurses were always open and honest with us, in a kind and caring manner. They helped mum and us to understand the options, and we never felt forced into making any decisions.

It was all in our control, but they made an enormous difference to us. Just having the support from available 24/7, whether we were at home, on the ward or at Cottage Hospice where mum died last May. I don’t want to imagine what it would’ve been like without the Hospice – if I had to guess, it would’ve been immeasurably harder.